The Eccentric, the Beauty, and the Detective: Kiriki Junka's Mystery Log Volume 2 Chapter 18

“How's your shoulder?” Junka calmly asked, “Does it hurt?”

Hinata nodded.

“I've had some painkillers for now, so it's just a little sore. For now, we know I don't have any broken bones, and I didn't seriously injure my head either, so you don't have to worry. According to the examination, I'll be back in school in a few days.”

I was relieved to the core, but I couldn't suppress the rising anger within.

“Did you see the bugger who shoved you?”

“Sorry, I didn't. I didn't even manage to spot the two who came and helped me… It was artfully done.”

“It wasn't your fault, Tatsuno-san.”

Junka had suddenly stopped and turned to face a wall, perhaps in thought. I gave him a shake and he came back to us as he turned to face me.

“What is it, Rouji-kun?”

“Thinking of something?”

He shook his head.

“Nothing. For now… I'm just glad that Tatsuno-san is fine.”

We walked side by side on our way home. The sky was dyed a rich purple as the sun and moon traded positions of prominence.

“Can you hear me out for a second, Rouji-kun? I've got the feeling that it's stupid, but…”

He was being unusually timid, and I nodded him continue.

“Shoot.”

“I've got the sense that it's the same culprit who pushed Hatanaksensei too, making this the second incident.”

“Yeah, seems like it. Not that we can say for sure, though. And?”

“The incidents started to occur after Sannomiykun came.”

I wasn't able to contain my shock.

“Oi, Junka, you couldn't possibly be claiming that Sannomiya did it?”

“You're way too loud, Rouji-kun,” Junka said before continuing, “The two who found and provided first aid to Tatsuno-san were Sannomiykun and Kanno-san. Aren't they doing a bit too much?”

I groaned. There was nothing else I could do. Junka was basically claiming that Eiji knocked Hinata over, and just casually returned to the scene, all innocent like.

“That's too much of a leap, eh? I don't think that's what happened. It isn't like you have any proof either.”

Surprisingly, Junka seemed to agree.

“True. Pretend this conversation never happened, then.”

He smiled, all while “meat” was still writ large on his forehead.

Erase that already.

The following day, Junka, Nao, and I all visited the music prep room at lunch to ask Hatanaksensei about the incident on the staircase.

Hatanaksensei was adamant that “The whole story really is that I slipped and fell, and nothing more.”

She wasn't going to budge.

Nao vehemently pleaded, “Please don't lie, Sensei. It's unnatural not to think this has some connection to Hinatchan getting knocked down. Somebody shoved you, right? Please just tell us who.”

Her eyes wavered, but her mouth continued to issue denial after denial.

“Sorry, but I'm not going to talk about this anymore. I need to eat my lunch.”

She had withdrawn into the darkness. Junka gave Nao a light pat on the shoulder.

“Let's pull back for now, Iidsan, Rouji-kun. Sorry for the intrusion, Sensei.”

Back in class 1, 3, Eiji and Yuuki were eating from a single lunch box — a three layered lunch box. My mind was still clouded by Junka's talk earlier, so I naturally kept an eye on Eiji. I'd rejected the hypothesis, but there was some doubt about Eiji left in my mind. I wondered what the probability was that he was the culprit.

Eiji casually looked up, and when our eyes met, his expression hardened.

“What's up with you? Need something?”

I didn't respond aside from looking aside and sitting down in my seat. I opened the package of bread I'd bought. Junka came to my desk, and began unwrapping his lunchbox. We began to eat.

I started to chat as I chowed down on my yakisoba bread.

“Now that you mention it, I've never been to your house, Junka. It's always the reverse.”

“Isn't it just cause you're always the one to invite me over? You love your games and just keep calling me over to play new ones over and over again.”

Junka raised some of his pilaf to his mouth.

“Well, it isn't like my house is a big deal. We're an incredibly normal household.”

I wondered what a normal household was to the highly eccentric Junka. It made me curious.

“So, is it all right for me to come over today?”

“No problem.”

That was how I first managed to set foot in Junka's house.

That evening, I was a little nervous on the way home. Junka didn't seem to care at all about anything other than detesting the heat in the streets as he walked. Before long, the houses came into view.

“All right, come on in.”

Following behind him, I turned toward his home, a two story single family residence. Junka took the evening paper and some leaflets from the mailbox and placed them under his arm as he headed for the door.

That was when Junka suddenly called “HIT!” and I had no idea why.

“Ouch.”

I'd been struck in the shoulder by something small. I looked down to see a BB rolling away.

“Don't worry Rouji-kun. It's a biodegradable BB that will return to the earth as dirt in a few years. We take care of the environment.”

I didn't care about that at all for the moment.

“It hurt you know.”

“It's a 0.6mm, 0.25g one after all. Also, Rouji-kun, you have to call ‘hit' when you're hit.”

I didn't get it.

“Who's attacking me, and from where?”

I looked left and right, but there was nobody suspicious. With a sense of trepidation, I looked up. In a window of Junka's house sat what looked like a soldier on some battlefield, wearing camouflage and goggles, brandishing a rifle. It was an elegant figure, and judging from the breast, a woman.

When she spotted me, perhaps sensing some danger, she hurriedly disappeared back inside. It seemed that our opponent in the BB war was none other than her.

“Who was that?”

“My mom,” Junka answered as if it was no big deal.

“That was?”

“That's her. She was once the champion of a big survival game, or sabage for short, tournament.”

“She won?”

“Yup. The tournament isn't run anymore, so she's just got the outfit sitting around.”

Junka turned the key to the door. I held my shoulder while I wondered just who would see a classmate of her son and fire an airgun at that high schooler… and also her son…

“All right, come on in.”

Without fully grasping the situation, I followed him into his abode.

“The hell?”

The fairly large entrance hall was packed with many multicoloured sandals. On top of all that was a white paper flying like a white flag.

“That's my dad's hobby. He really likes sandals. He's written more than one treatise on his discoveries about them. Due to his extensive research, it is said that he gets a boner with just a glance at a sandal.”

I didn't care about that at all.

“He's particularly into that white paper. Way back, I once tried replacing the paper, and he was struck dumb by it, losing all his vigour, so be careful not to touch it, okay.”

What kind of family was that?

“Let's go up, then. I'll show you my room.”

I removed my shoes and carefully hopped over the sandals so as to avoid disturbing them. Junka headed for the second floor, and I was right behind him. I was worried about where his mother was, as I couldn't see her.

“Haiyaaaa!”

Just as he crested the staircase, a mysterious figure slammed into Junka with a cry. The movements of the black shirt, gi, and full face helmet-clad figure were as fast as lightning.

Translator's Note:

I can say for sure now that I don't get the humor. Also, I'm going with a loose translation for this, since I don't really want to bother thinking too hard about authorial intent, or particulars of connotation and denotation.

Editor's Note:

Rereading this has helped me appreciate just how much ‘loosely' translating makes things smooth out. Maybe one day I'll have someone else edit this who can appreciate my slowly improving English.

Chapter end