Shiki Volume 1 Chapter 8 part8

8

The burial finished, the party returned to the Shimizu house, gathering in the tatami room for the meal. Seishin had done nothing more than perform the simple ceremony and thus was as usual hesitant about sitting at the guest of honor's seat at the head of the table.

Megumi's grandfather Shimizu Tokurou was once a central figure, having taken part in the village Diet. In his youth he was vigorous and prosperous, with an abundance of anecdotes to tell. Shimizu Takeo, his son, too, was an extraordinarily upright man. The hot blooded and easily excited Tokuro and the cool and theoretical Shimizu, were mirror opposites yet with a thread of commonality between them, so Seishin had thought for a long time. But, those two were seated as if beaten down. If it was rare to see Tokurou so worn down as to not express his emotions, then it was also rare for Shimizu to openly display his emotions without regard for who was watching.

Hiroko was both, yet neither. When you thought that the damn would break and she would wail and cry, she sat like an expressionless doll. When you thought that the comforting words from around her were earning a look on her face as if finding some peace, she would talk of her own grief, and in doing that like the lid was off the barrel of her emotions, her voice rung out with sobs. She would cry for a while when her eyes would raise like cloudy glass orbs, and as if a spring was cut fell into lethargic despondency.

The three seemed as if they hadn't come back to themselves. They most likeley must have felt that a part of them was deserted in the mountains. Seishin again had no words for the situation. Seeing them like this, he knew the words "Do not be too broken spirited" would hold no meaning. Megumi was too young. It was probably impossible not to be broken spirited.

Tokurou who always looked ten years younger than he was, today seemed more aged than his years, and the same to Hiroko. Her back rounded as she slouched forward with her head hung, mysteriously overlapped with that of Gotouda Fuki in his mind.

(...It would be best to be prepared.)

The words suddenly came to mind. ---Yes, it would be best to be prepared. Accept Megumi's death, and prepare to stand again from that even a moment sooner. You can't be discouraged. You must not dwell in this grief.

(But, how can I say something like that to all of these people here now?)

Seishin turned his eyes to Hiroko, with her open sobs. At times acting like the Shimizu he remembered, his hand would go to Tokurou's back, as if protecting his aged father, but at the same time it seemed as if he were clinging to his father, earnestly trying to keep himself in check. That was heart breaking, and at the same time something about it looked dangerous.

These people were all past their limits in bearing the shock of Megumi's death. Right now, their hands were full with that, and to want anything more of them was cruelty. None the less, Seishin couldn't help but want to pat each and everyone one of them on the back and say that they musn't be brought down. The thing was that Seishin himself didn't know why he felt such an impatient unease. But.

(It would be no good to do it like that.)

He had to stop the crying, quickly.

---When children cry the oni come.

Chapter end