I am you

The mansion where I currently was felt like a maze. Calling it just a mansion didn’t do it justice. It had countless corridors, each leading to different rooms and places that I had no idea what their purpose was. The fact that all this was meant for only three people was straight up wild.
Navigating through the twists and turns, I managed to return to the room where I woke up, not knowing what else to do. No one seemed to bother me either. There were always maids and butlers moving about, but they all just greeted me with bows and polite smiles, not that I minded that part, of course.
As I entered the room and took in the familiar sights, I was finally able to exhale the nerves that had been building up. The breakfast with strangers, now my supposed family, and the need to act as if I belonged here when, truly, I did not. Keeping up that act was harder than I thought.
What am I even supposed to do now? They kept mentioning a trial; what was that even about?
Closing the door behind me, I walked toward the table in the distance, hoping to browse through the books lying there, but before I could, what I saw from the corner of my eye made my blood run cold.
Glancing at the figure, leisurely sprawled on the bed, resting on its side, its head perched on its arm as it looked at me with a grin like it were the most natural thing to do, I couldn’t help but almost stumble back in shock.
Have I seriously lost it? I tried blinking, once, twice, hoping my mind was playing tricks on me, but no matter what I did, the cold fact was still there.
There, in front of me, the person staring at me with amusement was… me?
‘Don’t be so confused now.’ The figure spoke, barely holding back laughter, as it got up with a jerk and walked toward me, its eyes locked onto mine.
Wait, how the hell is he talking? What the hell is happening? My mind was reeling. First the absurdity of finding myself in this place, and now this. My steps kept moving me backward, trying to put distance between us, but he kept walking closer, closing the gap.
‘I know you’re confused, but don’t worry, I mean no harm.’
The figure added, raising its hands in a gesture of surrender.
“Wait… Stop, wh-who the hell are you?”
‘Who am I? Did you forget how to see as well? I am you.’ He replied, gesturing to his face. Looking at him, the face, the build, even the clothes were exactly like mine. No, I had to be going crazy from all this.
‘And you don’t have to yell to talk to me, you know. I’m not real after all. I’m just a part of you.’ He muttered, his words stretching as he took a step back and walked leisurely over to the chair.
That was when I noticed the strangeness in his voice. He was right; it was like he wasn’t speaking at all. The voice was in my head, just like the typical voice people have in their minds, only this time it was much clearer, more organized, more in control, more profound.
“Wh-what about what I am seeing?”
‘As I said, you can just talk to me, like a thought. As for what you see, well, this body…’
He continued, walking toward me and stopping just in front of me.
Raising his hand, which seemed to hover right before me, he added, ‘You can think of it as a way your mind is trying to cope with your duality. It’s just your imagination, really.’ Saying that, he waved his hand right in front of my face, almost touching my eye, but as I braced myself to block, the contact never happened. His hand passed right through my head, as if I were made of air.
What the actual hell.
Seeing what had just happened, I brought my own hand up, my fingers trembling as I tried to grab his shoulder, but again, there was nothing, just air. My hand passed through him effortlessly.
‘See?’ the figure replied with a grin before moving back to the chair.
As I was about to question him further, he motioned for me to stop, covering his lips with a finger before pointing to his head. Remembering what he had mentioned before, I tried doing what he suggested.
‘What do you want from me?’
I tried asking myself, like how someone would talk to themselves in thought, but instead of even having to process anything, the answer came on its own. As it did, the lips of the figure in front of me seemed to move.
‘Of all the questions you could have asked, you ask the weirdest one.’ The voice replied with a chuckle.
‘Well, I suppose you are too confused, so being the better part of you, I’ll make it clear. You died!’
He spoke with exasperation, his figure dramatically drawing a line across his neck.
‘What a fucking genius, have something more to add?’ I replied, annoyed.
Hearing my snark, he acted as if he were hurt, bringing his hand over his lips dramatically before laughing it off.
Yeah, no way that’s a part of me.
‘I can hear your thoughts, you know.’
‘Will you tell me what is going on or what?’
‘Okay, okay! Sorry… Ahem!’
Finally taking on a serious expression, he continued.
‘Look, I know you’re confused, but I’m only here to guide you. All of this might feel foreign, but later you’ll understand that it’s necessary.’
His words, though gentle, made rage build up inside me.
‘Necessary? You think I wanted to be shipped off to this weird place after finally managing to die in peace? And what? Guide me through what?’
The figure in front of me smiled, but it was almost sad, not really reaching his eyes as he looked out the window in the distance.
‘I know how you feel, trust me. I’ve been there as well. For now, the only thing I’m allowed to help you with is at least understanding where you are and who this body belonged to.’ The figure finished, turning to look directly into my eyes.
‘So, are you ready?’ he asked.
‘Ready for what?’
Before he could answer, he waved his hand through the air in a dramatic curve, and as he did, I felt a weird numbing sensation on my forehead.
Before I could even say a word, that numbing turned into something deeper as my head started pounding. Clutching my forehead, I yelped from the sudden surge of pain, collapsing to my knees. The pain increased, as if someone was trying to wedge my head apart. All my senses seemed to shut down, the only thing I could feel being the intensified throbbing.
And just before I thought I was going to pass out, I felt it. Voices, or maybe memories. Events flashed before my eyes all at once, my head almost splitting open with the intensity. No matter how much I yelled or clutched my head, it didn’t help against the onslaught, each memory raw and unfiltered. I could feel them, not just as visions, but as if I was living through them with every sense.
A white ornate ceiling, two figures looking down on me, their faces filled with love.
“Yun, we will call him Yun,” the woman before me declared.
A garden, flowers wherever the eyes could see.
“Let’s be friends.” A girl, no older than ten, chimed in, extending her palm.
“She is dead, son. Face it, she won’t be coming back.” The heavy voice of a man, grief-stricken yet final.
“Don’t worry, little brother, I’ll always be with you.” The faint whisper of a woman as she held me close, caressing my head as her tears spilled onto my shirt.
“You are the heir of the Frost clan. It is your duty to uphold our legacy.” The striking words of the man as he drilled me on fighting.
They kept coming, each more vivid than the last. At one point, it almost became unbearable; the information was too much for my senses, let alone my mind.
And just before I thought I was going to black out, the last of the memories flowed in. My figure retreating to bed, tired and battered from preparations for the trial, drifting off to sleep one last time. That was where it ended. I had no idea how much time had passed, Seconds, minutes or even hours, but the tide of events was finally over. The colours returned to my eyes, the throbbing in my head finally relaxed, though the remnants still lingered.
What the hell, were those memories? Of the previous owner? They felt so real.
Looking around the room with new clarity, taking in the surroundings, the previous sense of alienation and hostility was now replaced by a sudden warmth. The memories of spending all those nights here resurfaced.
My eyes landed on the figure, who was looking up at me with a smile as I pushed myself up using the wall.
‘It feels better now, doesn’t it? Like you actually belong here.’
He muttered, but before I could stop myself, the next words spilled out of my mouth.
‘The previous owner of the body, who was he? Wh-what happened to him?’ I asked, remembering the raw emotions I felt in the memories. The pain of losing his mother, the love for his sister, the determination to be recognised by his father. All of it felt so real, so human, as if it were my own.
‘He died.’
His words cut through me, shocking me to my core.
‘B-but how? Is it because of me?’
‘Yes and no… All I can tell you is that he was meant to die, to prepare this body for you.’
The figure replied casually, but the content of his words angered me. Meant to die… The absurdity of having ideals and destinies forced on us was something I hated to the core. Hearing from him how I had occupied a body of someone real, someone alive, just for them to perish for my sake made my breath catch in my throat.
There were so many questions I had all of them rolling through my head, and the only way to get an answer was right before me. However, no matter how hard I tried, I just couldn’t get them out.
‘I know how you feel right now, but trust me, it will get better,’ he added, finally getting up from the chair and walking closer, stopping just a few inches in front of me.
‘Now, my work here is done, so I’ll be going. We will meet again soon… If you survive.’
He smiled, and before I could say anything, he faded away, completely disappearing from my sight. I looked around, down at my own body, even trying to talk to myself, hoping to get a reply, but no matter what I tried, the finality settled on me; he was gone.
Fucking bastard. I was confused. Who really was he? Was he just me? Was he a friend or a foe, but for now, I knew I had no way of knowing.
Letting out a shaky breath I hadn’t realised I was holding, I led my trembling legs to the bed, lying down with my eyes fixed on the ceiling. The absurdity of this world finally started to settle on me.
A fucking fantasy world, of all things. With strange powers, and even fucking abominations that can literally tear you apart in seconds, just great.
The memories were still fresh. The entire life of the body’s previous owner was now right before me, and it all made sense. The father, Eden Frost, a man who lost his wife, the only person he truly ever loved, changing him into the closed-off and stoic person he was now. The sister, Lyra Frost, someone who dearly loved Yun and would do anything for him, just to see him smile. A prodigy, who picked up abilities similar to her father.
Then there was me, someone who had been hidden away from the noble circles by Eden due to his mark, encouraged to train, to condition the body, to grow stronger, to survive the trial, to become the heir of the Frost family, and bring it to new heights.
Holding up my forearm, I noticed how the mark seemed to almost pulse now, the skin around it heating up.
The trial, it was almost time. Yet, despite the initial fear of facing something I knew nothing about, now all I felt was calmness. This body, it had prepared for this very day since the day it was born with the mark.
Unlike his father or sister, who carried a crystal white symbol resembling frost, his was more like his mother’s, who had one of the shadows, though still entirely different. The uniqueness of his mark was the reason his father had guarded him from all prying eyes, waiting for the day his son would finally pass the first trial of the Soul Forge, to be granted his Nexus Affinity and become awakened.
All these memories still felt foreign to me, yet experiencing the love, the expectations, for the first time finding myself in a place where I was free from the constant dangers of the streets, I wanted to hold onto it. To live for the first time.
I felt sorry for the previous owner, not even knowing what had killed him. Had he died because of me? Was he still alive somewhere? Did he know this would happen? For now, I had too many questions. So all I could do was approach things one step at a time.
For now, if not for myself, then for the boy this body belonged to, I wanted to live, to do what he would have done had I never come here.
As sleep tried to overtake me, I remembered the countless moments this body had spent training and honing itself, whether it was instincts or combat. Anything to better prepare for the trial. And I could feel it too, as if it were all muscle memory. The patterns, the strength, the sophisticated movements, all of it was in my mind, blending with the way I fought on the streets, the way I survived back on Earth.
As darkness overtook me, I steeled my heart for what was to come. I had to survive, to succeed. If the memories were true, then the only way to survive in this cursed world was by strength. Otherwise, you would be devoured, stripped of what you held dear, and left to hope you had done better.

Chapter end