Curse The Mainframe!
/ Curse the Mainframe! 1 Punishment!
The more he thought about it, the more it felt like the last 'good day' he had was the day that he first took up the job, which was then promptly ruined by the appearance of the first transmigrator that had been sent his way.
The other Systems were clearly a bunch of incompetent, snivelling hacks that rolled over for the whiniest of transmigrators making demands that should not have ever been fulfilled. The words that left their mouths should not ever have formed a thought in their minds to being with.
It didn't help that he seemed to be the only one with a working brain in the workforce. Luckily, they were all separated during 'working hours' so to speak, otherwise System No.00290596 felt like he would go crazy if he had to spend any more time than required with those who lacked so much as two brain cells to rub together.
Sometimes, he felt like he was the only one who took this seriously. He could see how the rest were clearly tired of their jobs, just giving into the unreasonable demands of the transmigrators.
System No.00290596 just couldn't understand! Did they not take any pride in their work? Did doing the same job require so much of their patience that they even entertained the most outrageous of demands from the transmigrators? Even if they didn't, it was their job. They should follow the rules set by the mainframe's standards and do a proper job instead of just lazing off!
What good did it do to send in transmigrators to different worlds with all kinds of so-called 'cheats' that upset the balance of the world? Unacceptable. Who knew how many worlds had been doomed by those incompetents already?
Clearly, System No.00290596 had to pick up some of the slack and reduce the damage that had already been done.
According to the Mainframe's Rule Book Section B Rule714, transmigrators were allowed one reasonable boon to their lives after their lives prematurely ended. Should the transmigrator demand something that was out of the acceptable given standards, the System held the right to retract the given boons that were requested.
Even then, it felt like his life had become a series of unfortunate events lining up and piling together. It was like watching a train wreck in motion. You just couldn't stop it.
The transmigrators held none of his worries, and only worried about how to improve the standard of their lives in the next world.
System No.00290596 breathed out deeply in a rare show of more humane emotions, pinching the bridge of his nose. It was almost time for the next 'lucky' transmigrator to come in.
Take a deep breath, System. There had to be at least one reasonable transmigrator out there.
A small, soft ding was heard from the bottom of his desk, the Mainframe's way of telling him that the newest transmigrator had stepped into his office.
"Come in," System No.00290596 said in response to the knock on his door.
The large, wooden doors opened without a sound, admitting the frame of a typical bespectacled office worker.
Office worker Xi Kai, age 29, died prematurely after saving a child from a car crash. Typical for a transmigrator, right? At least, this was the Mainframe's sure-fire way of making sure that the coming transmigrator had at least a basic decency that was required.
System No.00290596 gestured for the man to sit down impatiently. The newest transmigrator looked like the level-headed type, which suited him just fine, but looks could be deceiving.
"Welcome, Xi Kai. As one of the chosen ones, you have a chance to transmigrate after facing an untimely death. As part of the basic bonus package, you are entitled to receive one bonus in your next life to help you."
The longer he waited, the more a sense of unease crept up on him, but the System shook it off. He waited for the transmigrator to gather his wits about him. Seems like this would go down badly.
This was understandably a stressful time for anyone, seeing as they were fresh off death. System No.00290596 tried to be as sympathetic as possible but seeing all the sheer idiocy from so many transmigrators left him jaded and weary.
System No.00290596 was hopeful that this one would be a sensible, reliable main character for a world that clearly needed it. He wasn't asking for much. They just had to be hard-working, smart, reasonable, and most of all, they had to be down to earth.
Wasn't too hard, was it?
Xi Kai's astonished expression as he took in the various, shifting data pads in the air did nothing to lessen System No.00290596's sudden anxiety.
"So… Is this where I meet god?" Xi Kai asked.
System No.00290596 hid the sinking feeling in his stomach. He felt like he knew where this was going already, and it was doing nothing for his temper.
He was rapidly reaching the breaking point.
How was it that every single one of these people shared the exact same characteristics?
Was the Mainframe deliberately choosing the same kind of people to cross over?
Why did it feel more like he was being steadily and slowly driven insane by these people?
"No," System No.00290596 said with patience that was quickly running out. "Transmigrate. Yes or no?"
"Yes, definitely yes," Xi Kai said, nodding eagerly. His black eyes seemed to shine with an unholy glee.
Just the sight of those familiar looking type of eyes put the System in a bad mood. He really was letting down all his expectations. "You have one wish that you can make now to carry onto your next life. What do you want?"
Xi Kai didn't seem to notice the System's colder tone, immediately blurting out, "I want to be unmatched in the whole world! Magic, martial arts, strategy, no one will be able to beat me."
System No.00290596's face immediately darkened at his outrageous request. "Denied!" he said without hesitation.
What a joke. That was against the rules! Besides, Main Characters had to work hard for their power! They weren't just handed power off the bat! That would cause the world they transmigrated to experience a power shortage for a short period of time, which was unacceptable according to the Mainframe's rules.
"Denied?" Xi Kai said with shock. It was almost like he never thought that he would be denied anything after his untimely death. "You can't do that! I demand that as my boon!"
Xi Kai ignored the System's thunderous expression. What could the System do to him anyway? He was already dead! "Unmatched in the whole world, or nothing else!"
System No.00290596 didn't even bother to keep up a pretence anymore, grinding his teeth. "Choose. Something. Else," he gritted out syllable by syllable.
"No way! Didn't you say I died an untimely death! Then you should accommodate me!"
The System let out a laugh filled with pure anger. "Let me say it one more time. Choose something else. If not, then be prepared for the consequences."
"I refuse!"
"Good," System No.00290596 laughed darkly. Whatever rationality that he tried to retain immediately snapped at the man's unreasonable words. "Very good. Then, you will indeed be unmatched in the whole world. You will possess an innate disposition that repulses any woman from your personality. Unmatched in the whole world! That's what you requested for."
"What!" Xi Kai blurted in shock. His glasses almost fell off his face as his eyes widened. "Wait!"
"Fuck off!" System No.00290596 snarled, slamming down on a button located on his desk. "Next!"
Xi Kai blinked precariously, but just as he was about to blink out of existence, a blue box popped up before him to rate the quality of the service that had been provided.
Xi Kai slammed his index finger on the 'Bad Review' button numerous times, each time with increasing hostility and venom, staring deep into the System's eyes as if he wanted to swallow the System whole. The man spammed the button as hard and quickly as he could, almost as if he could take out his anger on the System that way.
Then, he disappeared.
System No.00290596 hurled a data pad across the room, watching dispassionately as it shattered upon meeting the wall before it rematerialized and floated back towards him.
The boiling anger that had been stirred up by the unreasonable transmigrator showed no signs of decreasing at all.
"Fucking idiot!" System No.00290596 cursed the moron without two brain cells to rub together without any restraint.
Suddenly, the lights in his office flickered and darkened, causing System No.00290596's brows to furrow.
A malfunction? Impossible.
The room lighted back up again without giving him a chance to react as the office's doors opened without any signs of knocking, but not before he realized that everything that had been contained within the office had disappeared.
Through the doors walked the Mainframe.
The Mainframe wore a pair of frameless rectangular glasses upon the bridge of his nose, his facial features a mask of tranquillity. White hair, with blue eyes that sparked from the data that was constantly running through his processors, the Mainframe looked both otherworldly and wise. It was impossible to tell the Mainframe's age, seeming both old and young at the same time.
"Mainframe," System No.00290596 said respectfully.
This was the Boss! He was the highest up the ladder of the Systems, so to speak. He never expected that he would see the Boss in person.
"System No.00290596," Mainframe said, his voice containing a robotic, synthetic sort of quality. "You are hereby suspended from your duties. Bad reviews leading from up to 18761 hours ago have amounted to nine hundred. Good reviews, one."
Shocked, System No.00290596 narrowed his eyes at the Mainframe. He couldn't help but feel indignant and wronged. He had only been trying to follow the rules to the letter, but he couldn't deny that those transmigrators had all pissed him off through and through.
"Sir, doesn't the Mainframe's Rule Book Section L, Subsection 2, Rule 14 state that a System is only up for suspension once they reach ten thousand bad reviews?"
The Mainframe pushed up his glasses, and they glinted ominously in the light. "Approximately 1 minute 29 seconds ago, transmigrator Xi Kai lodged a total of one hundred and fourteen bad reviews before disappearing. System No.00290596 now holds a record of one good review, ten thousand and fourteen bad reviews, thus leading to the Mainframe's decision of handing out a suspension."
System No.00290596 swore under his breath. How was it that idiot had managed to lodge so many bad reviews so quickly? Just how quick were that idiot's hands?
"Do you accept your punishment? Failure to comply will result in the dismissal as a System, thus leading to a subsequent death," Mainframe said. The way the Mainframe talked was strange, without any intonations.
"Sir," System No.00290596 said, trying to retain the respectful tone that one should address their superiors with, "with all due respect, those transmigrators all overstepped their bounds."
"Do you accept?"
"Sir -"
"Do you accept?"
"S-"
"Do you accept?"
"I-"
"Do you accept?"
"Wai-"
"Do you accept?"
"If you'll just let m-"
"Do you accept?"
"Fuck! Fine! I accept! Are you happy?!"
"Punishment accepted," Mainframe said emotionlessly. He waved a hand, causing System No.00290596's vision to blur. "System No.00290596 sent to randomized planet. Mission: Help the Main Character! Sub-mission to be determined once System No.00290596 reawakens."
"Wait. How will I know who the Main Character is?"
"System No.00290596 will be integrated with a device that will allow System to identify the Main Character."
"Ho-"
"No other questions permitted."
System No.00290596's started to disappear piece by piece, but not before the anger that had been held at bay by his superior's unexpected presence exploded. The last thing he saw was the Mainframe's ageless, emotionless face.
"Fuck the Mainframe!"
Chapter end
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