Chapter 437: Thanks
Chapter 437: Thanks
"Hmm... this Batman-style exit..." Feng Bu Jue muttered.
"He's only using Instant Teleportation", Assass replied.
"By the way", Feng Bu Jue shifted his gaze toward Assass, "what exactly are you?"
"Physiologically speaking, I'm currently a male cat", Assass responded.
"Is there any possibility that under certain circumstances, you could transform into a sultry, shamelessly seductive older woman?" Feng Bu Jue ventured to ask.
"Hehe", Assass responded with a cold chuckle.
Feng Bu Jue shrugged. "Alright then... what exactly is your physical form?"
"I'm a cross-dimensional pure energy being", Assass answered. "Similar to your concept of a human soul... but with a different structure."
"Ah... may I ask for your honorable name?" Feng Bu Jue inquired.
"You don't need to know", Assass said. "You've already named this cat, haven't you? Just stick with that."
"Well then..." Feng Bu Jue asked, "should I address you as Mr. or Ms. Assass?"
"No need for specific titles", Assass replied.
Nodding, Feng Bu Jue said, "Okay then, Assass... can you explain those obviously trap-like 'deposits' you've left around?"
"Of course they're pranks", Assass replied while licking her claws.
"Hmm..." Feng Bu Jue's eye twitched twice. "Since we're having this open conversation now, I have a suggestion... how about you use the toilet directly from now on?"
"Indeed... cat litter really isn't that comfortable..." Assass responded.
"Right, right!" Feng Bu Jue nodded enthusiastically.
"There's also the matter of bathing", Assass added. "I'll handle it myself from now on."
"Oh, that's another good piece of news for me", Feng Bu Jue smiled.
"As for cat food, I don't want to eat it anymore. If you like, you can treat it as snacks", Assass continued. "I've noticed your cooking skills aren't bad. Starting tomorrow, prepare meals for me according to restaurant standards. I eat seven meals a day—frequent small portions. You can arrange the schedule as you see fit."
Predictably, she was starting to push her luck...
"Hey! I'm the master here, right? What's with this attitude treating me like a servant?!" Feng Bu Jue complained.
"We've already passed the point of being master and pet", Assass stretched her front paws and leaped onto the sofa, lazily rolling over. "You need to take responsibility, you know."
"You haven't fulfilled any pet duties in the first place... this is just escalating things!" Feng Bu Jue retorted. "Tell me truthfully, what was your purpose for sneaking into my home?"
"Primarily surveillance", Assass twitched her ears, her pupils flashing an unusual hue. "When necessary... I could also protect you." She yawned again. "Hehe... but you really are quite adorable. You seem cold on the outside, but you actually have quite the compassionate heart. I acted cute for a moment and got adopted so smoothly... Hmph... when you go to hell and no one wants you, come be my pet. Your big sister will treat you well, you know..."
"Do you believe I'll poison your food to kill you off..." Feng Bu Jue narrowed his eyes, responding coldly.
Assass raised one front paw. "Do you believe I can crush your knees with these cute little paw pads?"
"I don't", Feng Bu Jue replied.
Whoosh—
A silent burst of wind swept through...
Feng Bu Jue turned his head. On the living room wall, a massive claw mark had appeared. The paint hadn't chipped at all, nor had there been a loud noise, but the indentation was quite noticeable—like a deep imprint pressed into modeling clay.
Pfft— Feng Bu Jue immediately dropped to his knees. "This one has erred, mighty King, please calm your wrath..."
Assass affectionately patted Feng Bu Jue's head with her front paw. "That's better..." She paused. "Oh, one more thing—I and Wooly's existence..."
"I'll keep my lips sealed", Feng Bu Jue interjected quickly.
"Mm, very clever", Assass yawned. "I need to rest now, don't bother me... Haa... cats need to sleep so long... so annoying... meow meow..." She had already closed her eyes by the last few words.
May 22nd, noon—
Feng Bu Jue had just served lunch to Queen Assass when the intercom at his door buzzed. He walked over and pressed the answer button, Wang Tan Zhi's face appearing on the screen.
"It's me", Xiao Tan said.
"Come up", Feng Bu Jue responded, pressing the door release button on the intercom.
Less than two minutes later, Xiao Tan arrived at Feng Bu Jue's doorstep.
Feng Bu Jue immediately opened the door, letting him in.
"Uh... Feng Bu Jue... Assass is eating your food right there on the table..." Xiao Tan immediately noticed the odd scene upon entering.
"Hehe... I just love animals", Feng Bu Jue dryly laughed.
"Eh? Why is there a huge cat paw print on the wall?" Xiao Tan asked again.
"Oh... I had a sudden decorative inspiration the other day. I accidentally damaged the wall, so I decided to expand the damaged area into this design", Feng Bu Jue had already prepared this excuse during the two minutes Xiao Tan took to climb the stairs. He delivered it convincingly, perfectly matching his established personality without raising any suspicion.
"Oh..." Xiao Tan nodded.
"Alright then..." Feng Bu Jue quickly changed the subject. "You came knocking right at mealtime... surely you're not here just to mooch off me, are you?" He said, gesturing toward the sofa.
"Mm..." Xiao Tan nodded. "You've probably already speculated what I want to say, right?"
"Ahh, naturally", Feng Bu Jue replied. "Early this morning... some old memories suddenly surfaced in your mind, didn't they?"
"Mm..." Xiao Tan nodded.
"This matter happened so long ago", Feng Bu Jue continued nonchalantly. "You wouldn't seriously be going to turn yourself in, would you? Personally, I think even if you did, the Police would just consider you mentally ill. After all, years ago, the truth of this case was already buried by some extreme, irresistible force."
"Feng Bu Jue..." Xiao Tan spoke seriously. "Do you think... I can really live with myself like this?" He looked up at Feng Bu Jue. "Even if I escape legal consequences... but those were four lives we're talking about." His gaze darkened. "All these years... haven't you ever feared me? I killed them with my bare hands..."
"You're asking the wrong person", Feng Bu Jue interrupted. "My conscience has already been fed to the cat." He shot a deliberate or accidental glance at Assass, the latter completely ignoring him as she continued her meal.
Smiling, Feng Bu Jue continued, "If I felt any discomfort about this matter, you'd have been caught already. I could've reported it immediately after the incident." He rested his hands behind his head. "I'm no paragon of virtue, nor do I believe the standards for judging a person as 'good' or 'bad' are absolute. Whether those four thugs deserved death or not... I have no interest in investigating further. It simply doesn't matter to me.
When faced with choices, I made one that wouldn't bring regret. I chose to do everything in my power to help my Friend. That's all.
As for the consequences this decision might bring, I've long prepared mentally... The worst-case scenario would be your entire family fleeing overseas while I get summoned for questioning. Hehe... but I've left no evidence or testimonies, and at the time I was a minor—nothing would've happened to me.
But for you... considering the condition of those four bodies, even claiming 'Justifiable Defense' wouldn't convince anyone. If by some miracle someone did believe you, you'd likely end up in a research facility as a test subject.
In short, I made this decision after thorough consideration..."
"Thanks", Xiao Tan interrupted Feng Bu Jue's monologue. He knew that otherwise, Feng Bu Jue would start self-congratulating endlessly.
"For what?" Feng Bu Jue asked.
"Not sure..." Xiao Tan replied. "All these years... I don't know how many things I should thank you for."
His gratitude was sincere, but the response he received was...
"Oh, you needn't worry about that", Feng Bu Jue said. "I've got a good memory—I'll make you a list..."
(End of Chapter)
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