Alma 115 His Reflection and Joy

No… Using the word "regret" was out of line, even if I was exaggerating.

I don't regret it all. Not a single bit. I've never been happier in my life. By all rights, I shouldn't even be complaining…

He just felt like something had changed. For his entire life, it'd been him against the world. He had kept his distance — kept his guard up — and done his utmost to limit his interactions with other people.

It's not like I hated people. Not in general, at least. I just couldn't bring myself to deal with them anymore.

I just found it to be a tiring exercise in futility.

The bare minimum had been enough for him. He didn't need or want anything else. At best, it was unnecessary and at worst, it was a liability.

Relationships born out of convenience and mutual interest had been enough for him. There was no need to over-complicate what could be expressed with the words "Yes" and "No"— it was better to not get invested and played like a chump.

I enjoyed the privacy I'd gained. In time, I even called it a blessing.

Of course, it was nothing more than my cowardice speaking.

It was a decision he'd made of his own free will. And it was not one he had made lightly, knowing full well what it'd entail in the end.

There was nothing to be gained in isolating oneself. He understood that.

What he had traded was one kind of pain for another. Still, at the time, he'd considered it a decent enough deal. Being alone was painful, but being betrayed and used was much worse to him.

He could get used to one of them, but not the other. In the end, he had grown so accustomed to the pain that it completely disappeared one day out of the blue…

Something vaguely similar to solitude had taken hold in the empty void where his heart was supposed to have been.

Twisted pride and joy — a pitiful feeling born out of his loneliness.

That was why it still felt so jarring to him, even now. For the longest, he had thought that'd he spend the rest of his life alone, but now…

This is infinitely better. I can't even begin to imagine going back to that pitiful way of living. I refuse to go back.

Lu'um tilted her head in confusion and said, "Hey, what's the matter?"

His life had taken a crazy, sudden turn, one he could have never expected to happen.

A miracle occurred — he'd found someone special.

A girl had shattered his little world and given him a new lease on life. And now, he lived in a different world. One where she existed, too.

He was no longer alone, not anymore.

"Hmm? Oh, sorry… I was just thinking about something stupid or rather, about someone stupid. An idiot I once knew," said Reed.

There were plenty of instances when he thought that it wouldn't have worked out between them. She was much stronger, wiser, and developed than him as a person.

It was the initial reason why he'd been so hesitant. In simpler terms, he'd found her intimidating, to the point it'd been somewhat off-putting for him to take the lead in their relationship. He had force himself to do it, as if it was a cumbersome, daunting task.

He knew that it was wrong for him to think of her that way, but he couldn't have helped it back then. After all, he'd been obsessed with the idea of being someone special. Having someone as outstanding and brilliant as her had been extremely confusing and vexing for him at the time…

Hidden envy and shallow attraction were what had once formed the basis of his interest in her. He had only seen the power she possessed and not the person behind it — the concerned, lovable girl who'd been there for him since they'd first met.

These days the only thing Reed felt was anger toward his old self who'd taken Lu'um for granted. He wished he could go back in time and give his past self — the snotty, self-absorbed little turd — a good beating and rebuke until he understood how blessed he was to have her by his side…

Lu'um buried herself in Reed's chest and said, "…Is that so? And who might this idiot be? Have I met him before?"

Him? …Seriously? It really is scary how perceptive she can at times…

Reed rolled his eyes in annoyance. "You really are too cheeky for your own good. I don't know what to do with you sometimes, you know that?" He ran one his hands through her chestnut-brown hair and said, "So what were you trying to tell me?"

"I've been thinking that we should go out and visit one of the bigger cities sometime. You know, get some fresh air and explore something new. Not that I dislike Cem-Elle, but…"

"I understand," said Reed. "Cem-Elle's wonderful but even I'm starting to feel a bit bored, too. …I'm not against having a change of pace if that's what you want."

Reed had come to love the little town but it'd long since become a bit boring him as well if he had to be completely honest.

Cem-Elle was located near the sprawling mountain ranges of the West and the wild grasslands of the South. The town itself had been built in a beautiful valley and was by all rights, an arcadian paradise far removed the hustle and bustle of the major cities.

It was a peaceful little slice of heaven that'd been by mortals who'd wanted as little contact with the outside world as possible.

They both loved Cem-Elle, but life in the slow-moving town had come to fatigue them a little bit. Apparently, there was such a thing as too much peacefulness.

Reed, who was a natural introvert and reclusive at heart, had not been affected as severely as Lu'um but even he had come to feel the fatigue after two whole years of the slow life.

Lu'um naturally loved the slow, peaceful life they'd built for themselves too, but she'd come to grow a bit tired of the repetitive nature their daily life.

It'd wouldn't hurt to go out and venture around for a while. It's been too long since we've done anything big, I guess…

"How about we go visit the Golden Coast, then? I've always wanted to see visit it after, well, it was recommended to me…" said Reed.

It was supposedly everything that he'd dreamed of and more.

Pristine, golden beaches, clear blue skies, and beautiful wome—

Reed suddenly felt a jolt of pain run across his sides and he flinched in shock like a frightened cat.

"Ow! What was that for?! I didn't do anything," said Reed, absolutely aggrieved.

Lu'um had an unconvinced, skeptical look on her face as she stared at Reed's face.

"I felt something was off… and I'm pretty sure I was right. My instincts have never failed me once when it comes to you, dear," said Lu'um in an eerily cheerful tone.

"…I-I don't know what you're talking about at all! I was just thinking about the beautiful golden beaches and the fun we're going to have!" said Reed.

She's too fucking sharp! Holy shit that was close! Fucking hell..!

He did not want to get on her bad side if at all possible. After all, he'd seen what she could do with her bare hands alone. Even without her powers, she could easily tear him a new one if she wanted to.

For better or worse, he had fallen in love with a beautiful girl who could probably beat a dragon to death with her fists and walk away unscathed. Hence, he thought was in his best interest to not anger what should not be trifled with.

It was bad enough that he couldn't do anything whenever she became… voracious, so to speak…

He "suffered" enough, though Lu'um would certainly fiercely object to that description if she knew that was what Reed thought of her passionate acts of affection. 

She'd defend herself and state that Reed was no better than her when he got excited himself, either. Such were the intimate affairs between the young couple. 

Nevertheless, they both loved each other despite what they thought of the other's preferences.

Their love was as bashful as it was passionate, exemplary of people who were young. They'd made many a mistake throughout the two years they'd dated but in the end, they'd found bliss. 

For Reed and Lu'um it'd been worth the great effort they'd put into understanding one another -- giving themselves another chance after what they'd been through before respectively.

There was nothing he would not give for her and she the same. In that respect, they were one of the same mind... and heart.

Chapter end